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| How about NO. |
Short answer, "Nope!".
Recently I saw a post on a dog forum that annoyed me. It went something along the lines of "If your dog doesn't like children you should never take him out or let her off leash." Yeah, because staying at home will get them used to stuff! Big SIGH. It was interesting because the whole conversation of the thread was revolving around dog parks. Most dog parks are not safe places for dogs let alone little kids but that's a post for another time.
Repeat after me: "This is NOT a petting zoo!"
It's important to remember that any animal can bite. Even the most friendliest kid social dogs have their limits!
Think about it if you lose patients with your kids how do you think the poor dog feels?
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| Sorry kid, Zoe just wants to poop. |
Okay, so lets get back to the thing that annoyed me on the dog forum. Neither of my dogs are comfortable with children. Zoe has had some very bad experiences with them and Phoenix has always been skittish. Neither of them appreciate teacup humans with grabby hands. Zoe is okay with older calmer children so occasionally I will allow an older child to say hello to her. It's my job to be my dog's advocate, though and it's perfectly okay to say NO, you may not pet. Just because they are not fond of children doesn't mean they can't ever leave the house. If they never left the house, they wouldn't be used to anything and I believe that would be worse. Personally, I'd really like to see some parents take responsibility and actually teach their kids manners rather than letting them run wild and expecting every dog to be tolerant. Since I can't control that, I try to avoid rowdy children for the most part and we are always training. I try to be vigilant and protect them from scary situations. If kids do run up to us we have a treat party.
The other thing that bothered me was the part about never being off the lead. It's one thing if a dog is aggressive and known to be so. That dog should definitely not be off leash. My dogs go out of their way to avoid conflict (most dogs do not want conflict and if they can get away they will) and if a child ran up to them they could actually escape and get away versus being on leash where they are trapped. Which situation sounds better to you?
Anyways, I really wish people would do a better job at teaching their kids how to be safe around dogs, learning dog body language would be a plus, too and also having to hear NO once in a while is a good thing. Not every dog (or even dog person) wants to be social with kids and as long as they are not aggressive they have every right to be out with their people. I just want to go to the pet store or take my dog to potty without being harassed, is that really so much to ask for? As important as it is for dogs to be trained it's equally important for children to be trained, too.
Also, I just want to say thanks to all the parents out there who are responsible and proactive with teaching their kids to behave around dogs. They are few and far between but I am always thrilled and my faith in humanity is restored when I do run across them!
Does your dog like kids? Or are they wary like mine? What do you do in those sorts of situations?
You make some good points! I try to teach my kids all of these things, and if I see a dog and I have my 3 year old with me I am very attentive to her and the dog. Watching the dog's body language and making sure the dog is OK to pet. If the owner says yes, I still watch BOTH of them very closely. Even if I tell her "no", it's highly likely that she will ignore me and do whatever she wants so I have to be ready to grab her if I need to. The thing with kids is they misbehave and can just be little monsters sometimes no matter what you do! She's young and learning, but she still has quite a ways to go. I think a lot of parents just assume that if the dog is in public, they are friendly with everyone and it's just not always the case.
ReplyDeleteThanks! I used to be more open to kids around my dogs until the bad experiences started happening! Now with everyone being sue happy it's safer for me to say no. Phoenix would rather be out with me and temporarily traumatized then left home. I understand that kids will be kids so we are prepared for that but I love it when I run into parents who actually try. :)
DeleteMaybe it's a regional thing, but in my area (DC metro/suburbs), I find most kids have been trained to ask first, even the little ones. And most parents are on guard, ready to swoop in and snag their kid away. My dogs are pretty tolerant of kids but I still feel at risk. You just never know...what your dog might do, or what a little kid will do that provokes the dog. My dogs have been in all kinds of busy environments but truth be told, they would rather just stay home. By the end of a busy day somewhere, they are SO sick of people wanting to touch them! Not just kids....
ReplyDeleteThat's awesome that the kids are better in your area, Taryn! I totally agree with you. You never know what that kid is going to do or how the parent will react. I've found it's easier to say no.
DeleteMy dogs are the same way by the end of the day, too!
Barley is very wary of children! We have very specific rules for the kids in our neighborhood (she has to sit first, they have to pet her one at a time, all bikes/scooters must be set on the ground before approaching her, the list goes on and on . . .) and she gets massive amounts of treats while they pet her! Usually, it's just easier to say no, but there are a few older kids that she doesn't mind very much. Usually, if we see a kid running towards us, I quickly move Barley to the opposite side of me and we turn in a new direction. I always get a little bit of delight when I see the look of horror on a parent's face as the "I Need Space" leash registers in their mind and they grab their children before they get to us.
ReplyDeleteWe have very similar rules, too and only the older calm ones are allowed to visit and just with Zoe. Also, LOL about the look on the parents face. I generally enjoy that look as well. :D
DeleteToo many people with kids think the world should revolve around them. Newsflash it doesn't or shouldn't. I do not agree with the comments on that forum either. I guess it is good that I am not a member because I am sure I would have piped up...lol. If I had a dog that did not like like kids I would not let them off lead around kids I suppose but never? Even if there are no kids? If I ever buy an island I will invite you and your dogs to come run off lead....lol.
ReplyDeleteI couldn't agree with you more!!! I want my own island, too! LOL :D
DeleteOh, I want to get in on that island deal! :)
DeleteSome people.... Great post!
Luckily we have mostly had good experiences with people being nice about it if I say their kid can't pet Rita (she's skittish anyway with strangers and has no experience with small humans) but maybe they are muttering about us after we leave! :)
Such an important topic! Thanks for writing this. On the positive side, a neighbor was out for a walk with her two year old this morning. I had my dogs in the front yard with me while I watered. They stayed in the grass and the neighbor was saying "look at the black dog!". I was a little nervous so I was reminding my dogs to stay. But then she said to the toddler "Oh no, don't go in their yard, let's respect their territory. Watch, look, he is sniffing the grass - isn't it neat to watch them". She then told me about how she is trying to teach him to watch dogs without running up to them. The child was watching attentively and staying with the neighbor so nicely. And my dogs were relieved and stayed put too!
ReplyDeleteThat's so awesome! I love it when I run into parents who actually try to work with their kids! Good pups for staying, too! :D
DeleteGreat blog! We are constantly working with our grandkids to teach them respect and kindness toward all animals. Unfortunately, not all kids get that guidance.
ReplyDeleteThat's awesome! Good job!
DeleteThis is such an important topic to talk about. Our foster dog is scared of any sort of sudden movements or loud noises and even though she has never acted aggressively, I would be devastated if someone scared her and she bit out of fear. It would be worse if this happened because someone wasn't aware enough to do the polite thing and ask about her first.
ReplyDeleteAwe, I'm sorry your foster dog is so scared! Phoenix can be like that, too!
DeleteI have a darling little neighbor girl who loves dogs. She is probably 3 or 4 now, and I think her first sentence was "Can I pet your dogs?" She adores every dog she sees, and is gentle. I usually cross the street if I have Theo with me since he can be unpredictable and say "Sorry, he's not very friendly." She seems disappointed, but she's also okay with it.
ReplyDeleteWhen I have all 3 dogs, sometimes I'll let Nelly and Sophie approach a child (if he or she wants to pet them) and keep Theo closer to me. It is better to be safe than sorry. I'd feel terrible if Theo ever hurt anyone.
That's always nice when you have good kids with parents who do their job!
DeleteSuch a great topic; I'm very lucky that Laika is amazing with children. I have no idea why because if a dog looks at her wrong it goes to hell - but kids she loves. It certainly makes me a nervous wreck when we go to the park though; kids running up to her & shrieking... Yeah thank goodness for the parents who put a stop to that because I really hate having to tell other peoples children to chill out.
ReplyDeleteThat's awesome that Laika is so good with kids! I wish my girls were a bit more comfortable with them!
DeleteWow, great post Lauren! So important!!
ReplyDeleteღ husky hugz ღ frum our pack at Love is being owned by a husky!
Thanks! :)
DeleteI actually have more problems with adults making grabby hands at my dogs than I ever have with kids. Most kids either ignore my dogs, tell me they're cute, or are very polite in asking. I don't encounter many kids when out with my dogs, since I tend to go where lazy kids stay away from. :p Adults, on the other hand! They will come up behind me in stores, attempt to call Nola to them when she's off leash at the beach, or purposefully block a walking trail to intercept us. It's insane. I HATE having my dogs touched by other people. Hate it.
ReplyDeleteAll of mine are amazing with kids of all ages. Pike really likes preschoolers, and Nola LOVES babies.
I've had that happen, too! I just with everyone would be respectful!
DeleteShyla is not totally comfortable with any stranger, and kids are scarier to her than adults. When I first had Shyla, I found that people invaded her space without my permission quite often. That doesn't happen very much anymore. I believe that I've changed my body language when I'm out and about with her. (that's just my guess as to why things have changed. For Shyla's sake, I consciously try to act calm and very self-assured when we're in public - and perhaps that "act" is working on the humans too!)
ReplyDeleteNow, even grown-ups ask permission before approaching, and they obey me if I say that Shyla is having a bad day and doesn't want to meet anyone that day.
As for kids, I try to make a very quick evaluation when a parent asks if their kid can meet Shyla. I am evaluating Shyla's current level of stress and the kid's behavior. Every now and then when all signals look good, I say that Shyla is a little afraid of kids but maybe they can help me with that... By putting it that way, they follow my directions about what to do, and they don't get upset if Shyla gives signals that she doesn't want to meet them.
I leave the door open for meeting kids because I'd love for Shyla to be more confident around them - and without experience, Shyla won't ever get that confidence. I want her to have it for that day when a kid in a park comes running straight at us - I know it will happen again someday.
Sorry for the long comment but this has been an evolving issue for me... Great thought-provoking post!
No worries about the long comment! :) You make excellent points!
DeleteIf only hoomans realized how terrifying little hoomans can be!
ReplyDeleteYour Pals,
Murphy & Stanley
For sure!
DeleteGreat, great post. Mauja and Atka LOVE kids. Especially Mauja - the tinier the better for her. When I was babysitting a 6 month old I used to let her play with Mauja. Oh, it was so adorable watching them roll around on the floor together.That's just pyr nature with kids. However, I HATE when kids just run up to them without asking. First, they don't know if my dogs like kids. Second, it doesn't allow me to work on proper behavior. If a kid just runs up to us, I don't have the opportunity to make sure they are both sitting calming beforehand.
ReplyDeleteThank you! Yeah, I totally know what you mean! I had that happen with Zoe a ton of times before she became fearful of them.
DeleteMy dogs are fine with kids... unless the kid is running at a dog park, in which case, Leo likes to herd them by grabbing them by the clothing using his mouth. What could go wrong there? I haaaaaaate seeing kids at the dog park and I haaaaaate having to tell them not to run at the dog park. One kid, whose parents weren't around, I told twice, and he ignored me both times. BUT. Then I saw him start to run a third time, notice Leo beside him, apparently remember my warning, and stop running. So, success?
ReplyDeleteThis lady got so mad at me one time for telling her kid not to run in the dog park.. It was pretty funny. I only told him a dog was going to knock him over.. and the signs were really clear about it being a dog park not a kid park and that kids should be sitting or holding a parent's hand. Someone needed to tell him!
DeleteVery passionate about this subject! I completely agree with everything you said! Cody is shy so an outing has to be a positive experience. Little kids run up to dogs and engulf them before you can even say no petting!
ReplyDeleteMy cousins and their three kids were staying with us a few months ago. Their little girl was about five and went through every cupboard in the house and she just wasn't gentle with Cody. I was constantly watching her as I've worked hard getting Cody to be confident with people. I don't want him to be scared of people in his own house!
And I love Cody's appearance but every time I try and take him out, we attract a crowd of people. I would be so grateful if people could teach their children the right behaviour around dogs!
Totally agree, kids need to learn to interact with dogs. Even dogs who like kids can have reactions to kids who don't react appropriately. Phod loves everyone and is gentle with kids and patient. Hailey is fearful. We are working on that.
ReplyDeleteSuch an excellent post! Parents who don't teach their kids to always ask if it's ok to pet someone's dog (or other animal) are remiss. You never know what a strange animal is like or how they will react to you. I'm lucky to rarely have had kids come bounding up to my dogs. The few times it's happened I've stopped them immediately and instructed them how to approach my dogs. I've actually had more adults do that! It's our responsibility to always advocate for our dogs. Every dog deserves to get out of the house and be in public on leash - dogs do not exist for other peoples' entertainment!
ReplyDeleteLove & Biscuits,
Dogs Luv Us and We Luv Them
Excellent advice. My dogs don't HATE kids but Delilah often times sees the little ones as part of her pack and will growl in 'teaching' mode. I ALWAYS watch my dogs around children. The other day I slipped when my grandson was over. I was preparing food (a key trigger for Delilah) and he went to pet her and she snapped at him. When she moved her head, her nose bumped him in the nose and it really scared him. I felt horrible because I had let them both down. It was a good reminder to me that I need to always be diligent.
ReplyDeleteNice reminder article, really people need to understand and try to take care of their pets.
ReplyDeleteonline pet shop